searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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