Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize