Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
