Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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