a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Sex in the backyard? Check.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
