Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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