if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
