i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize