He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
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