The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Randomize
