so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
either way he was missing a nipple.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
