you guys were way drunker than both of me
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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