a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Randomize
