Where is the hickey?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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