thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
The uberlube is also flammable
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
