TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
