I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize