If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
