at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize