You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
