Where is the hickey?
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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