Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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