I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
