D3 body, D1 cock
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
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