Whoa Z and x make the same sound
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
