Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
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She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
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mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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