By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
