Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
