Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
how does that bad decision feel?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
