Little spoons don't ask big questions
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
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