batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
one might say we're banned from that church
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
