she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize