So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
