I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
