Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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