Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
handjob tips. give me some.
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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