And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Walk of Shame today included voting.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
