Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
