Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Someone shattered a urinal.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
You've changed since you got that strap on
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
