There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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