would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
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