Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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