Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
