How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
be right there i have to get my cape
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
