Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
