drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize