I have demons in me.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
