He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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