why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
