Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.

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(954): View more from Florida

i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.

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(260): View more from Indiana

Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five

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(812): View more from Indiana

She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.

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These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Read it at the TFLN blog
(610): View more from Pennsylvania

My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.

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(912): View more from Georgia

I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself

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(309): View more from Illinois

I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.

(472): View more from

Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?

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